Thursday, April 29, 2010

Happy Couple While Rabbits Starve?

A new report that has been released by Buggs for Freedom found an amazing statistic that when couples smile and take pictures together, rabbits are not being fed in 95% of the cases. This stat was brought up to the couple to the left, Jill and John (whom we will call Miss Jill and Mister John for the sake of anonymity), and they were startled by it.

"I can't believe that," said Miss Jill in an almost indignant manner. "What you don't see in that picture is me holding a carrot. And Mister John has a bunny sitting on his lap."

"THUMP" was the response from one Cherry M. Bugg who came up with these statistics. "That guy has more grey than Jane," she said. Finally adding, "Bless her grumpy old soul."

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Chip Afraid to Visit In-Laws

Poor Chip has been watching too much news on TV and now he is paranoid that if Miss Jill and Mister John take him to visit Miss Jill's parents in Arizona that he might be deported. Chip realized that he doesn't have any papers and his father, Root Beer, Sr., is still in Denmark teaching gymnastics. (Note: that supplements his income to go on tour and compete in jumping exhibitions.) If Chip is deported then he may never see his grandparents again!

Cherry Bugg, however, welcomed this turn of events. "We don't like his kind of subterfuge here. We think he needs to go!" Chee never exactly stated who the "we" she was talking about. But it was quite alarming that she would speak that way against her own nephew. "My brother got all the love," Chee later complained. "It was always Root Beer this and Root Beer that. I say THUMP to that. Thump, I say."

Mama and Papa Bugg ignored this rant knowing how much they love all their grandchildren. "It's MEH that my babies don't get along but this whole anti-Rabbit thing in Arizona has got to go. They have all those ugly jackrabbits there. Why not some really cute Buggs?"

Papa Bugg later off the camera said he'd support whatever position got him a free beer and some smokes.

Chocolate Bunny also reminded everyone not to eat chocolate.

Oh, life in the Erb family.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Smiling on a Sunny Day

It's a lazy Saturday at Chez Erb so Mister John is sitting around relaxing. Well, he did take the weed whacker to the sprinklers. And he did check the sprinklers which work... well, adequately.

The tub was fixed yesterday so Miss Jill can calmly sit in the tub while pondering things like "when not to feed the bunnies." That's ok, it just allows Mister John to stand around and smile like in the picture to the left. Happy guy. But methinks he needs a shave.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Miss Jill Returns Home from Portugal

Miss Jill returned home tonight from her long sojourn in Portugal but the bunnies were not extremely receptive. Chip did come in to greet her in the bedroom but Cherry Bugg drove him out. It was duly noted by Miss Jill though that Cherry Bugg did buy her a "Get Well Card" with the word Well crossed out and replaced with Home. That was quite a cute thing by the bunny.

The den now has a big carpet in it so Chip does not have many places to sit on the cold smooth tile any more. I bet he likes the rug. It will give him more of a reason to run faster. Those rabbits sure don't like tile floors.

RBF update: she's taking her medicine. She'll be OK but that nose of hers sure gets stuffed sometimes.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Commute Bunny Styling in Lisbon

No one has heard from Miss Jill in a while. But I have received an e-mail from Commute Bunny who is happy and hoppy in Lisbon, Portugal. She's been up all night dancing and wreaking havoc on the local culture. Rumour has it that she'll be home in the next day or so. I hop so. I miss my Commute Bunny.

Cherry Bugg on the other hand does not want anyone home. She loses bed space.

Commute Bunny better have bought some gifts for Prince Phillip as he does hail from Iberia after all. Then again CB might not know her Iberia from her Siberia.

Cherry Bugg Bitten by Dodger Kissie Bugs

Cherry Bugg has been happy the last few days because she's been able to sleep on the other side of the bed. But today she complained that she was attacked by the most heinous insect of all: the Dodger kissie bugg. I believe she was attacked 14 times today. Very thumpable. So she did what she could: she ran into the living room and bit Chip on the butt. And so it goes in the Erb family.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Sisters Snuggle Under the Swing

This weekend Root Beer Float and Ruby Jane escaped from their normal Sunday activities of hopping, thumping, and sprinting to flop under the swing in the back corner of the yard. There they snuggled cheek-to-cheek and rested there for at least 30 minutes. Occasionally Phillip hopped by to guard the two but they were safe under the large wooden swing. Nearby the occasional fallen orange may startle them but that does not faze them. In fact, RBF can chomp down an orange in a remarkable time.

In a related note, Mister John is thinking about having another large carrot eating contest between Root Beer Float and Ruby Jane. While it is a "boat race" in the sense that RBF will clearly out-eat her dear sister, Guinness does want to check the time in which she can eat the giant carrot. My rabbit, a potential Guinness Book of World Records holder.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Bunny Found in a Basket!

Miss Jill was walking through the den today and came across an odd site. She called me and said, "Mister John, did you know that we have a bunny in a basket?" I incredulously said, "No, I did not know we had a bunny in the basket." But there she was. Root Beer Float sitting in a basket wondering how to get out and what was for dinner. It's a good thing she didn't act like her aunt Cherry Bugg and start biting the wicker. That would have been unfortunate.

If you find any examples of bunnies in a basket, please let us know. It might be some sort of odd North American species that had previously been unspecified by those scientists who give those wacky Latin names to things. Bunnius basketus. Or something like that. Binomial nomenclature rocks.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Andre Ethier Runs Away from Bad Start

While Miss Jill and I were in Arizona two weeks ago, we went to a minor league baseball game. The Dodgers were playing the Cincinnati Reds at the Reds' ballpark in Goodyear, which is about 10 miles from her parents' home. That made it quite easy for us to go see the Blue play. And with a small stadium of only 5,000+ of your closest friends, all the better. Just remember to duck on those foul balls. This isn't like Dodger Stadium where (unless you spend a whole bunch of money) you sit far from the field and never worry about getting smacked by a foul ball. The Dodgers won that game but that obviously has not foreshadowed the start of the regular season as the Blue have started at a 2-4 clip. The relief pitching has exploded in the past two games, giving away probable victories against a mediocre squad. And Andre Ethier, pictured to the left, has been hurt for the last few days. Hopefully he will be better for the start of the regular season. But for now, run Ethier. Run far far away!

Of course if you have any free tickets to the Dodgers, Miss Jill and I would be happy to take any tickets that you may have. I guess we really should work on expanding this blog so more than two or three of the regulars read this. That's alright.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

The Endangered Pillbug!

Miss Jill calls them rolly-polly bugs and we have seen very few of them in the past years. Maybe they all fled upon our wedding... who knows? Maybe they fear rabbits. That's more likely. But the population of the helpless pill-bugs has dropped precipitously. Make sure you help save this poor little creature before it rolls up into a ball for the very last time.

Long live the pill-bug. We salute you for your awkward shell, your small curved antennae, and your tenacious strut across the sidewalk. Unlike the louse of Robert Burns' fame, we will not leave you to saunt and sinner. You will be a valued treasure in our yard.

Please don't thump.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Before and After

No time vortex today. I was just going through some of the older pictures of the rabbits and noticed that Root Beer Float and Ruby Jane had some baby pictures they needed to see.

On the right are their young bunny pics. On the left, their more adult and furry selves.

Bunnies sure have long ears compared to when they age.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Root Beer Float Trapped in a Time Vortex!

In a near rabbit tragedy today (or was it not today?), Root Beer Float was trapped. I believe it was a time vortex. Or it was some sort of oogly-googly fence keeping her trapped. It may have been one of those energy vortices in Sedona, Arizona, which Mr. K is ensconced in. Then again we all know that Mr. K is from Turkey. Or a city named Lithuania in Turkey. For those confused, please go to the following link:,17164/

Anyway, where was I? More precisely, when was I? Well, possibly in the future. While looking at this picture of poor Root Beer Float trapped in a temporal vortex, I noticed the timestamp at the bottom of the picture. It's in the future! She hasn't been trapped in a vortex yet! Or maybe when I saw her, I was the one in the vortex and then I was shipped back in time. But I don't own a DeLorean. Oh, the paradox of time travel.

Yet dear Phillip tried to come to Root Beer Float's rescue. He reached the outside of the time vortex and was unable to rescue her. Honestly, I don't know how or when (which when assuredly!) she escaped. I noticed she was in her cage this evening. But she seemed older and more forlorn for the activity, almost like the Wedding Guest at the end of "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner."

On a related note, at some point in the next fortnight (hey, I'm a British Literature teacher, I can get away with that), the new season of Doctor Who is out. Yes, there is a new actor playing the vaunted time traveling iconoclast. Let's just hope he was as good as the previous one. Just stay away from police boxes and don't, I repeat, don't pet the cholla! (You thought I was going to say, "Blink," didn't you?)

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Strong Earthquake Strikes Southern California; Root Beer Float Not Impressed

According to, a string of earthquakes rattled the Pacific Coast of the United States and Mexico on Sunday, including a magnitude 6.9 quake that could be felt across Baja California, southern California, and the Erb family backyard which startled Phillip and caused Ruby Jane to run across the backyard..

That quake, centered about 175 kilometers (110 miles) east-southeast of Tijuana, was the largest of at least many that struck from the Mexican desert to the northern California wine country, according to the USGS. But none of this truly mattered to Root Beer Float who quietly sat through these tremors and pondered why her sister was acting so apoplectic. She even asked her sister why all the fuss. "It is just a typical disturbance caused by the continuous rubbing of the Pacific and North American plates. Why all the fuss?" Ruby Jane still ignored her and continued to run laps around the back yard. After a few minutes, Ruby Jane relaxed and sat under a tree eating an orange peel.

While the original 6.9 magnitude has just been raised to 7.2, this still has not affected Root Beer Float to do anything spectacular. In fact she hopped over to the other side of the backyard and started eating the leaves from branches Mister John cut down that were hanging over their back fence. Calm under pressure is that RBF. Regardless of magnitude.

Rabbit Liberation Day!

It is the biggest day of the year for rabbits: Rabbit Liberation Day! The day that they are free of the bondage of human servitude. Ironically, Root Beer Float and Ruby Jane were not that gracious when Mister John opened up their cage and put down their ramp this morning.

"Thump not lest ye be thumped," quoth he.

"Huh? THUMP!" sayeth Root Beer Float.

Meanwhile Chip went to express his liberation to Cherry Bugg. She expressed it back by biting his fur. And so it goes on liberation day...

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Ella Moo Grazes in the Back Yard

Saturday is typically the day for Cherry Bugg to run about in the backyard. But today the Chee is inside on the bed with Miss Jill as they watch Gilmore Girls, or something like that. In her absence, Miss Ella Moo, the bedroom cow, rests in the back yard. She occasionally grazes but never in the same space as Root Beer Float or Ruby Jane.

Ella followed home Mister John one day after he visited his new grad school campus. Unbeknown to him, she sneaked into the car and has been a home cow ever since. She is quite the cheerful animal and reminds Miss Jill of the importance not to eat too much meat. She does often tell Mister John and Miss Jill to eat more chicken (just like those commercials). But this causes controversy as Cherry Bugg has often been referred to as "The Chicken" due to her proclivity of brooding in the bedroom. And Cherry Bugg does get a bit irritated when Miss Jill pushes the "Are You Chicken?" button which plays the Chicken Dance.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Cherry Bugg Does Not Get Cinnamon Toast Crunch

Unfortunately for Cherry Bugg this morning, she discovered that her nephew Chip had been eating some Cinnamon Toast Crunch! The horror for the bedroom-loving rabbit. She had been asking for it all week long yet Miss Jill left a box behind in the den for Chip to munch on. Cherry Bugg was dignified in her assessment of the situation. She went and hid in her purple castle.

One of these days I'll take a picture of the purple castle so you'll all know where Cherry Bugg goes to hide. It's basically her Fortress of Solitude. Or she might call it, her Fortress of Buggitude. RBF refers to it as the Fortress of Stinky Butt but I do believe that was in jest. Anyway, Cherry Bugg wants some cinnamon toast and she wants it now!

Do Not Kick, Pester, Hold, or Hug the Cholla

One thing that was clearly learned upon our trip to Joshua Tree is that one should never hug a cholla. Why, yes, the signs did say not to do so... but one of us actually did. Unfortunately for that one person, the cholla like to say hello as well. And as you can see on the right hand side, that was quite an ouchie. The cholla have microscopic spines which prove not only quite efficient at sticking in the subject but also very painful to remove. So the lesson was learned.

However, this same person has not learned how to discipline Cherry Bugg after the Chee nips her on the hand.

Small steps.