Thursday, July 29, 2010

Chee Gets Another Bath

She had too many carrots so she is suffering from orange bottom. Nothing but hay for her now. She won't be happy with it but that's the way it has to be. Chip shouldn't be laughing; he is next.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Monty Wants an Oil Change

This morning Monty said to Mister John and Miss Jill that he wanted an oil change. He said, "Mister John and Miss Jill, I want an oil change." So Mister John and Miss Jill have agreed upon giving him one. He will get one later this week and everyone will be hoppy.

Do recall that Monty received his name from the location in which he first encountered Mister John and Miss Jill: Monterey. He's quite the happy fellow and Mister John really enjoys the air-cooled seats.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Chip Begs for Food

Mister John was wandering through the kitchen to get a glass of water. Upon filling his tall glass full of ice cubes and deliciously fresh and cool water, he almost tripped over Chip who sneaked into the kitchen looking for a handout. While sometimes Miss Jill and Mister John wonder about Chip's thought processes (he stares at walls for hours upon hours... much like sophomores), he definitely knows where the food is. Of course if Mister John would open the fridge, it would smack dear Chip upside the head. Oh well, such is life for the starving young boy who thinks he is a man. He daily challenges Cherry Bugg and then runs away helpless every single time. Ah Chip, ah humanity!

Relaxing on a Summer Weekday

Mister John and Miss Jill are currently resting up before their arduous summer sojourn to Louisiana begins in a few days (again more information on that in a bit). Here they just sit back and watch the day go by. And maybe feed a rabbit or two.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Chill Day for Ruby Jane

Sometimes she hops inside (like here), sometimes she hops outside. Life is simple when it is broken down into prepositions. Inside, outside, up, down, around.

We all need to live life a little more like Ruby Jane. Life can be so busy and troublesome. Just think: inside or outside.

Sometimes it can be broken down into verbs: eat or sleep. With Mister John starting a short-term vacation tomorrow, he will think of things in verb form as well. Eat, sleep, read. Alas, for Mr. John, aka Coach Erb, he needs to read (not only Paradise Lost) a ton of Decathlon material in the next few days before he and Miss Jill are swept away to Louisiana. Ruby Jane, on the other paw, will stay behind.

What Ruby Jane does NOT know is that there are plans for building her a new cage this weekend. Yes, a new cage for the Bugg sisters!!! Cherry Bugg will be so jealous yet ultimately indignant. Chip will be oblivious.

Miss Jill Has Odd Sense of Humour

What is Mr. John now, the butt of Miss Jill's sense of humour?

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Summertime for the TV Turtle

While Miss Jill and Mister John are out and about, the televisions at home are left to Theodore Victory Turtle, aka TV Turtle. He's in charge of the remote controls and snaps at any person or rabbit who tries to usurp his power. TV Turtle originally followed Miss Jill into her Pasadena condo and kept an eye on the remote there. He's quite a wise animal to have as remotes tend to get lost and it is better to have someone whose sole purpose is to keep an eye on it. Everyone knows that Chee Bugg would bite it or Clifford "The Bunny Stopper" might fall asleep but TV Turtle will always keep his focus.

TV Turtle does like watching shows about fish. And if Miss Jill or Mister John has fish for dinner, he definitely wants his portion. He's been known to hop up to either person in the middle of the night and smell their fish breath. Kinda creepy, maybe but dude's gotta have his fish! Always a good reminder to brush every night.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Mister John Channels His Inner Gump (or Keanu?)

Mister John had his own sitting and waiting fest a few weeks back in Long Beach. He sure can sit up straight once in a while.

As for the box of chocolates, he better have saved that for Miss Bugg. She was a big fan of chocolate. And cake.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

John and Jill Van Gogh

This afternoon Miss Jill and Mister John went to create some artistic masterpieces. A new place in El Segundo teaches you how to draw and paint your own artistic renditions of basic artwork. The two "Owls" portraits are examples of what can be done there. Both of these took about two hours and taught both of them the practice of patience. And not getting paint all over you! Oh, and something about mixing paints as well.

The only problem is that these need to be in a separate room than Commute Bunny. Everyone knows that she has problems with owls, birds, and bats (baseball bats too). Oh, and she has an irrational fear of the musician Santana as well. Go figure. Next time we'll paint a rabbit.

Summer Sundays...

...are for snuggling against a cool wall in the shade.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Chip Only Wishes to Say Hello to Phillip

On a calm warm but comfortable Saturday afternoon, the boy Chip (right) hopped out onto the back yard grass to surmise the situation. He liked what he saw as there was no Root Beer Float to pick on him. There was a Cherry Bugg but typically she hops over to him to show dominance and he hops away. It's a bit embarrassing for him but he understands the rabbit hierarchy in the back yard. Or does he?

As he sat out there and pondered his existence, the Spanish rabbit prince Phillip (left) hopped by. Typically they're not out at the same time because two male rabbits of clearly different social strata should not be out in the backyard. However due to a quirk of fate (scheduling error, solar eclipse, door left open, time vortex), they were both out in the back yard enjoying a calming afternoon of sunshine, airplane noise, and tasty grass. Conflict? Hopfully not but who knows.

Unfortunately for Chip, disaster struck as he confronted Phillip to say hello. First of all, Phillip doesn't use English (or Thumpish) as his first language but rather Spanish. And Chip should have known to at least greet the great prince with a worthy show of respect. He did not. So as the picture to the left thus shows, Phillip chases Chip around the patio to show his displeasure at what just happened. Poor Chip just wanted to have a bit of fresh new conversation. Chip doesn't get to talk to other rabbits much since he stays inside every night.

In Chip's mind, this is what should have happened.

Chip: "Why, hello there?"
Phillip: "Hola, como esta?"
Chip: "I am well. How about the lovely weather today."
Phillip: "Hace color."
Chip: "Why, it sure is. I would like to eat some grass today. How about you?"
Phillip: "Si, vamanos."
Chip: "OK."

And off they would go to eat grass and tell manly tales of rabbitness. Alas, as the picture on the right shows, Phillip bit Chip on the butt to remind Chip of the rabbit pecking order in the back yard. I guess bites on the butt transcend any language, except maybe Thumpish.

In another twist, Mister John just stood back and watched it all happen like some sort of a Wild Kingdom narrator. He stood there idly by the tower fence (as we now call it) and watched it all happen. Of course there was also Miss Jill with the camera. If anyone is to blame for the vulgar display of power (guessing not many Pantera fans read this blog, if any), it must be her. Her taking pictures of this rabbit melee is akin to paying off bum fights. OK, maybe not.

In other related news, it really looks like Mister John needs a haircut. Or them all cut! Ha! That was so funny.

No one truly appreciates the humour of the bloggers of the world. Oh well, such it is.

The day passed on without further conflict.

Cherry Bugg Does Not Know Swahili

A slight problem has surface as Miss Jill and Mister John were thinking about adopting a rabbit from another country. Such international adoptions have been on the rise over the years. And with such notable and high-profile international bunny adoptions by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, it seems to be all the rage now. That's great and all but it makes it really difficult for the normal bunny loving family to adopt from outside the country.

Furthering the problems, the Chez Erb rabbits do not speak Swahili. While they all naturally speak "rabbit" (or for those who don't know, Thumpish), they do not know the local dialects of eastern Africa. Poor ol' Zabunja (pictured here) knows very little English and even less Thumpish which might prove difficult in adjusting to American rabbit life. Phillip, of course, speaks fluent Spanish (European Spanish of course, none of this Latin American Thumpish as he calls it) but not even he knows French or German.

The most well-versed of all the rabbits regarding language would be Root Beer Bugg but as we all know, he is spending much of his life overseas competing in jumping competition. Root Beer Bugg was greatly inspired by his Uncle Olaf who is pictured here. He was the first rabbit to win the EuroBunny championship in consecutive years. He personally trained Root Beer Bugg and while has done well, he has rarely visited home. Mama Bugg is ok with it as she has had many children who have hopped off without giving any return respect to their mother. Anyway, Root Beer is fluent in over six languages but sadly knows nothing about Swahili. Poor Zabunja may never get adopted to the United States. But there is always hope.

Hot Day Leaves Bunnies Flopping

As it does with Mister John. He's flopped on the couch and the two sisters are flopped elsewhere in the living room. Cherry Bugg is out today but even she is sitting in her cage wondering why it's so warm out.

On a side note, Ruby Jane does not like it when Mister John puts the hose to her.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Expectations Oscillating Between Vapid and Insipid

But don't tell the ghost of Charles Dickens that. Or at least the Ghost of Thumpmas Past. I'll leave that for Miss Jill.

Monday, July 12, 2010

Mister John Has Low Expectations for Book

Only 370 more pages of Charles Dickens to go. At this point, I'm rooting for a random eight-foot monster to enter the novel and strangle Pip out of existence.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Phillip Celebrates Spain's First World Cup Title

It was a raucus afternoon at the Erb household because Spain was in the World Cup final for the very first time. This of course means that Phillip, the Spanish rabbit prince, was ears up and ready to watch the action. For much of the first half, Phillip was nervous and just hopped about and spent some time in the back yard sitting under the orange tree wondering if the victory would come to fruition after all.

The second half was even more harrowing as the kicks went back and forth and still neither team managed to knock in a goal. The increasing amount of Dutch yellow cards barely assuaged his anxiety throughout the half. He kept hopping about thinking about those penalty kicks in the end. That's like judging a rabbit on his ability to run or hop and not how to coordinate a hutch. Water dish here, potty tray over there, potpourri near the back wall.

As the game went into the extra time (overtime as Mister John calls it), Phillip hopped into the bedroom to watch it with Mister John. The only problem was that Cherry Bugg was already in there and she clearly neither appreciates nor understands the "beautiful game." She, much like her Bugg kindred, think that soccer is a waste of great amounts of edible grass. So she tried to attack him but Phillip adeptly jumped up to the bed and stayed with Mr. John for the rest of the game.

To the rabbit prince's great satisfaction, Spain pulled it out with only a few minutes left before penalty kicks. "Viva Espana," he exclaimed before finally retiring to the back yard for the evening. He quietly prayed for his dear late wife Princess Jane and then sipped a sangria (with a carrot chaser) to relax for the rest of the evening.

Such is life at Chez Erb on some Sundays...

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Root Beer Float Didn't Mean to Go Potty on Mister John Twice Today

Currently Root Beer Float is trapped in a cage in the bedroom after going potty on Mister John for the second time in 90 minutes. He picked her up from her cage earlier as he was going to get some food for her and her sister Ruby Jane. Alas, the potty train started rolling.

Later in the afternoon, Mister John unwisely brought her indoors while Miss Jill was watching Gilmore Girls. She went potty on the cover and his UCLA t-shirt (2009-10 Den shirt). Two shirts in one day. Miss Jill thinks that Mister John needs practice in case he wants to be a dad. That means if a child of his goes on him, he'll lock the child in a cage for a few hours with a cage and a bowl of water. Sounds like something the parenting books might not agree with.

Outdoor Table Has Revarnished Look

Mister John refinished the outside patio table last weekend and now it's looking much more snazzy. He's not sure how well Phillip, the interior decorator/rabbit, will like it. As you can see in the picture, Phillip is there on the bottom right hand corner giving the revamped table a once over. Hopefully he likes the succulents as well.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Ancient Picture Resurfaces from John's Past

Going through the archives of scanned photographs, Mister John found one of his Loyola '89 buddies. Raffi Kartalian is to the left, Chris Grunewald is to the right, and Siddhartha Olmedo is crouched below. Sidd and Raffi both went to UCLA while Chris graduated from UCSD. Not pictured is Alfredo Forero who may or may not have been leading a KIIS-FM insurrection against his home country of Colombia.

Mister John seems quite thin. This must be right before the ten year reunion in 1999. Yikes, the 20-year reunion has also passed. Raffi and John went to that one. Less people, and they were all older. Well, yeah.

Do note Connie was in deep hibernation in another room at this point. She first followed Mister John home back in 1991. So long ago. But she never talks about her age.

Cool Connie Hibernates for the Summer

Connie has officially started her hibernation for the summer. After UCLA lost to South Carolina in the College World Series, she put on her trademark shades and said that she was going to sleep for a bit. Miss Jill, Mister John, and the Animals are all giving her wide berth not wanting to awaken her, lest she start rasslin' anyone or anything that moves. Cherry Bugg has already started avoiding her. Instead she bites Miss Jill on the arm at 3am wanting carrots. Oops.

Not to worry, Connie, UCLA football will start soon enough. Mister John will awaken you in time for the first game.

Monday, July 5, 2010

Mirror Mirror on the Wall...

Who's got the hottest legs of all?

Miss Jill and Mister John Find Artifact That Reminds Them That They Are Married

While cleaning out the purple room this morning, Miss Jill came across a large plate from their wedding night. They originally created the artwork in the middle at a Pottery Barn (or something like that). She and Mister John had this plate signed by all of those who attended their wedding way back on November 18, 2006. Yes, so long ago.

As you can see from the picture, Miss Jill is on the left with the white dress and blond hair (if that were Mister John, then there would be problems). Of course on the right is Mister John with his tux and nice white bow tie. Just beneath Jill is Princess Jane (rest in peace, oh beloved bunny) with her precious "Grrr." Meanwhile Cherry Bugg is near Mister John as she claims that she wants some cake. It was quite a delicious cake (others still rant about the tri-tip). In an odd twist, Mister Jill and Mister John still have some frozen wedding cake in the freezer which they bust out for anniversaries and other odd days (Saint Swithin's Day?).

So if you click on it and look around, you may be able to see your name in there somewhere. If not, maybe you weren't invited! Now what's up with that?

Root Beer Float Spends Time Pondering Existence in the Tub

Due to her bizarre eating habits, Root Beer Float felt a little ill last week and needed cleaning. The only solution for her was the tub after a good washing of her fur. She had only received one bath before this -- a good thing to note because she and her sister Ruby Jane groom each other quite well -- so she was a little apprehensive (to put it lightly) about taking a bath. After giving Mister John a bath as well with all the splashing, she finally settled down and relaxed. She later spent some thinking time in the bath wondering all the key questions in the world. Why do bad things happen to good rabbits? Why don't they let us out more? What would happen if the world ran out of carrots? And... what's on the other side of that gate? Is there another world out there? What is the matrix?

But after a few minutes of that, she hopped out of the tub, escaped Mister John's grasp and ran about the house, running here and there, and dripping water onto the tile floor which upset Miss Jill. That of course made Root Beer Float chuckle as Miss Jill does not feed her and then gets upset when she tracks water about in the house. But as soon as she was trying to figure out if that action was either symbolic or ironic, Mister John grabbed her and put her in a towel and dried her off. She suddenly felt loved and happy and those questions went away.

Mister John Survives 4th of July 5K

Not much to add here. He and Pete ran their annual 5/10K in the Palisades. Once again Mister John finished in a quicker time than Pete. Never mind that Pete claimed he ran a 10K and Mister John ran a 5K... Mister John ran to the tape in a quicker time. To make things worse for Pete, his wife Lillian also beat him. She actually beat Mister John by about 10 seconds as well.

Lots of relaxation and water drinking ensued afterward. Water, good. Rest, even better.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Phillip Watches the Second Half with the Animals

This afternoon Phillip, Mister John, and the Animals sat on the bed and watched the second half of the Spain/Paraguay soccer match. Phillip was quite happy with the result as Spain won, 1-0, but not without some scary moments. When the Spanish team fouled a Paraguayan in the penalty box, he thumped loudly which scared the Animals. TV Turtle almost snapped at Papa Bugg do to that surprise. Clifford silently rooted for Paraguay because they wore red but was happy to see Phillip bounce about after the game ended.

Phillip rarely spends time in the bedroom as he tends to be more of a solitary individual. But Mister John wants to make sure that he, still a widower of eight months, mingles with other animals. He does get along well enough with Root Beer Float and Ruby Jane.

Luckily Connie has retired into hibernation. I have a good feeling when UCLA football starts in September, Connie will be back in full growl ready to rassle anyone.

As for Phillip, he shall sleep well tonight. At least until the semifinal against Germany.

0-0 at Half, Phillip Not Amused

Mister John had an audience with Prince Phillip this morning and afternoon and so far neither side has scored in the Spain/Paraguay match-up. Paraguay knocked one in but was called offside.

Upon the half, Phillip thumped on the ground three times. He was quite unhappy with their performance so far even though they had possession of the ball for over 61% of the half.

Mister John will let him be for the halftime and get back to work on varnishing the patio table.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Phillip Prepares for World Cup Quarterfinal

As to be expected, Prince Phillip is ecstatic about his Spanish soccer team advancing to the quarterfinals. He fully expects them to take down the lowly peasants of Paraguay.

He was initially upset that Sports Illustrated picked Spain to win the World Cup this year. He learned from Mister John that any time SI picks you for anything, you're destined to fail. Do note that back in 1995, SI did pick UCLA to win the basketball title that year and they did.

Phillip was a bit peeved last summer when Spain lost to the U.S. (of all teams!) in a tournament. He was ridiculed by the rest of the rabbits in the backyard even though they know nothing about soccer (other than it's on a tasty green pitch). His dear beloved Jane consoled him though. She was always there for him. Such a great princess.

Needless to say, Phillip (who is usually quite a hand's off sort of guy) will be sitting inside with Mister John during the quarterfinal game on Saturday morning.

Was That a Bugg Butt? (no, another kind)

Root Beer Float headbutted her sister today to get at some tasty greens. She didn't think that anyone was watching but Mister John gets home earlier now from summer school and watched this incident underneath the orange tree. She headbutted her a second time as well. Usually her sister Ruby Jane is the assertive one but maybe it's RBF's turn to lay down the backyard law.

None of the bunnies look forward to Independence Day. Well, first of all, they do not get any independence (which will be added in a later blog). Secondly, all the noise in the neighborhood from neighbor's illegal fireworks (always illegal in LA but can be bought in Culver City) startle them just a tad.